Lincoln Six Months

Six months; it has gone by in the blink of an eye. It really does seem like yesterday we were trying to get Lincoln to gain weight and give us just four hours of uninterrupted sleep and now he's almost sitting on his own, practicing with a sippy cup and eating 3 meals a day! 

He loves his toys and playing with his feet (as you can see) and it putting everything in his mouth; and I mean everything! He's learning to sit on his own and is starting to lunge for toys...so I'm guessing crawling is only a few months away.

He is 16lbs 12oz and 26 inches long- falling in the 50th percentile for weight and 25th for height. So, he's not the tallest kid on the block... but hey Fred is average height and I am short so that's about what is to be expected. He is super healthy though and strong and a very sweet boy. He is a little sensitive and leery of strangers but is so good-natured and happy most of the time. Our days lately have been busier as he's moving more and more and its taking more and more to keep him occupied. He gets bored with things more quickly so he's definitely keeping us on our toes. 

This is a very typical Lincoln face...chewing on his bottom lip and big eyes looking at you. He is such a beautiful boy too. And yeah, I know, he's mine so of course I think he's beautiful. But, sometimes I just look at him and I can't believe we made him. I can't believe how beautiful he is and how very lucky we are.

Fred and I have certainly got into the parenthood groove and a lot of frustrations that we had at the beginning are starting to dwindle. And of course the question of the moment is; do we have a second one? Do we want a second baby? Are we ready? Can we afford it?

Well I always thought I wanted my children 3-4 years apart but now that Lincoln is 6 months old and Fred is 40 years old and I'm 30 things have changed. It took us a year and a half longer to have Lincoln then we anticipated and things with my job have changed so the question is pressing us when Lincoln is younger then we originally planned.

The reasons we want another baby are many and the reasons to not have another baby are just as many. It is a super-hard decision for so many reasons. 

First, we want another baby because the amount of love and joy Lincoln has brought us is incredible and profound and we'd love to have another baby and increase that love and joy. It is perhaps more important for me to have another baby because when Lincoln grows up I don't want him to feel like he is missing out on an important sibling relationship. And selfishly when I'm older I would like more family around me. I see Fred's family with all of the siblings and cousins and nieces and nephews and while I am very happy with the family I have I do envy that sibling bond. Fred actually has biological nieces and nephews; something I'll never have. 

However, it took two miscarriages and a lot of work to have Lincoln. I was doing twice daily injections for two years and my pregnancy (although uneventful) was very risky. Lincoln was an emergency c-section and was very small (too small) when he was born. Although even with all of that my doctor has actually told he he hopes I have another baby. I think the biggest question weighing on our minds in addition to my health is costs. After having Lincoln we've certainly noticed the cost but its manageable and comfortable. However, should those costs double we would be really, really tight on funds. I'm actually angry this is even an issue because of how hard I've worked in my career and in school to get a good job. And I do have a good job but money is still constantly an issue. Add to that the fact that Fred and I both have some very expensive medical conditions. Could we afford two babies? Probably. Would we be putting ourselves into a tight spot financially and potentially living paycheck to paycheck, yes.

Its just a hard decision to make; but we'll need to make it one way or the other pretty soon.